Do you think my story sounds good?

Die? Again? I thought confused, everything seemed so cloudy and confusing. I didnt feel like I was dying, my ankle was throbing with pain, as was my back and head.But I was feeling ok other than being extremely tired, it would be so easy to close my eyes... "JAY!" my eyes jerked open and my head banged against the wall sending new shoots of paing through what seemed like every nerve in my body. "Jay get her out now!" It was travis shouting now. Him and Zech were holding the arms of the man, who was bearing his teeth at coltin, but stoped and turned his head to look at Jay, who was reaching down for my hand. I reached up, and grasped it. His hand felt so warm compared to mine. He pulled on my hand standing me up. The pulling on my arm was painfull but bearable. unlike the sharp stabbing pain that my ankle gave as soon as I placed the weight of my body upon it. I gasped with pain and fell to my knees my hand on my ankle ankle, breathing hard trying to hold back the tears that threatend to force there way out. I squeezed my eyes shut and slid onto my but, my legs stretched out in front of me. I had no idea how I was going to get out of here. I felt arms lifting me up, opening my eyes I looked at Jay who was cradling me like a baby against his chest.